A year ago I made a New Year's resolution to publish my book, Julia, Coming Home, by hook or by crook! In my mind, that meant sitting on the doorstep of one of the seven or eight Christian publishing houses until one of them threw me the bone of agreeing to publish the book.
I knew this meant a publisher might offer me little in compensation and/or demand that I change things in the book; maybe even "compromise" the message. Yah, yah, yah. I was ready. Ten years was enough to spend on the project and I was well into the sequel, so time to move on.
My husband was astonished to hear the amount of money I would need to attend writer's conferences to pursue editors or agents. Thousands. But he agreed. (No. You can't have him.) New clothes, manuscript prep, airline and hotel reservations, and tons of correspndence later, I found the "pubs" were not interested--in just about anything. Publishing is in a recession, too. Or maybe a decline. Everybody's quaking. But it's not just the turn in our economy that is causing publishers to freeze and bookstores to close doors, it's the new trend toward electronic publishing and Internet ordering that is shaking the industry.
However, I had a New Year's resolve hanging over me. And I felt I must have some sort of possiblility of income, like having published books actually sell, so my husband didn't leave me. I tried "self-publishing" too, but was quickly dissolusioned which brought me to opening my own independent publishing company. Of course. There's more on all this elsewhere.
The result of the formation of JustDustPublishers.com? We have four lovely books in print and selling, but I am flat broke.
I am running out to the company's bank today just to deposit a check for $20. That's to be sure I have money to meet a bill. Later this week, I'm actually going to use a Christmas gift certificate to put gas in my car so I can drive to Sisters for a writer's retreat with a friend--she lives there and puts me up in her guest room for free.
Wow! I haven't lived this tightly since I was first staying home with young kids with one income for the family. Sometimes the feeling of "just making it" makes me feel young again--like I'm living on the edge. But today I feel old and weary. I want to just close the publishing door and go to lunch with a girl friend at a street cafe in Paris.
I feel poor today, but my mind knows better. Oh, I am sure that the main answer to my tight publishing budget is to simply sell more books. And I have to tell you, I am regularly petitioning God to do so, especially now. But, the treasure I want is not warehoused at the bank.
The truth is I am rich to overflowing in satisfaction. God has incredibly blessed me in answering His call to begin this company. The books we have are beautiful-their messages compelling. I have received personal feed-back from readers proving the purpose of the books well met. These successes are above me. Not of me, but golden coins of promise.
And Mark still hasn't left me. I'm a lucky girl.
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21 ESV
No comments:
Post a Comment